1/11/09 Mitzi discovers tv

For some reason, our cat had never noticed tv, until 1/11/09. Then she stood in front of the tv for like 30 minutes, giving us the opportunity to make her our own LOLcat.

Will work for chicken

Once I was coming home to San Antonio from South Padre, where my mom always loaded me up with food.
There was a guy on the freeway exit ramp with a “will work for food” sign.
I gave him a chicken. A home-smoked whole chicken.
For some reason I had to go around the block again and he had stashed it under a bush and was back in position.
It didn’t seem odd then, but now the fact that I gave him a chicken makes me giggle.
I wonder what the people in the car behind me thought?

Weather

The Weathertainment is in full swing. For the love of Mike, it is January in Ohio, If it was raining frogs, that would be news. We have had some interesting precipitation lately. I hear that Eskimos have like 300 words for snow (67% of all statistics are made up on the spot!), but I wonder if they use "Slurpee".

XMas

For Xmas, I officially got everything I want. I am caught up on material things. Mr S got me the GPS I wanted and his folks, crazy generous as they are, gifted us enough scratch to buy new phones. Cue Mormon Tabernacle Choir, because hallelujah I got my iPhone. I have craved one for years. What kept me from my Precious is the fact that I was mistaken in that AT&T didn't provide a corporate discount like Verizon that AT&T had displeased me greatly as a customer in the past. But come on, 5 years is long enough. I tried very much to like the Storm, but it was clunky and ...not an iPhone. We're still in the transition period since we have 5 days left on our V contract, but I already use it for so much. Like video games. Nothing like picking up a new teenage habit at 39. I expect to start smoking weed any day now. I love Urbanspoon, Wikitap, Tap Tap, Topple, Boomshine and I haven't even made it through many of the free apps. Ahh. One Phone to rule them all.

Oh my sides hurt. Stop making me laugh!

A while ago, a viral video went around showing Cagney and Lacey on this British talk show, Graham Norton. The video was pretty funny, if juvenile, and I forgot about it. I was browsing through our 6000 channels and stopped at BBC America. Saw his show listed., Thought what the heck, I'll watch this. Hooked. Absolutely smitten. GN is this adorable and funny man and the show usually has one famous American and a Brit comediam or actor, always entertaining, and a lesser-known-in-the-US musical guest. The funny part is actors and musicians from the US go on the show and don't realize it is silly, raucous, irreverent and uncensored like in the US. My first whole show was Jackie Chan. JC was funny without really trying. Robin Williams was a scream. It seemed he was delighted to be able to "open it up" comedically again. Brendan Frasier was absolutely baked, but he apparently is a very good at being funny while trashed because the stories he told about monkey self-fulfillment had me in tears. The last show, all I can remember is Lego Baby Jesus Circumcision. Many videos on the website.

Flotsam

Went to the Olde Towne Easte Toure Ofe Homese with D. I like these home tours. See some interesting homes, meet some nice folks, get a little exercise. Other touristas can be kinda dickish though.
We decided to grab a bite to eat, but D wanted soup and I wanted sushi. Whole Foods to the rescue. While we were there, I asked D about Greek yogurt because I'd seen it around but didn't know what made it different, aside from some obvious jokes. She said it was "like real food", unlike the $0.59 dannon crep they sell. I bought a couple varieties and the next morning I not only had a new favorite breakfast food, but I also would never eat the other stuff again. My fave now is a bowl of fruit with a couple scoops of yogurt and some Splenda brown sugar. Absolutely delish. Plus buying it by the pint is a lot cheaper. One exception to the yum is Trader Joe's little Greek Style Nonfat, not very good. I like Fage, all varieties and TJ 2%. Occasionally I, oops, grab the not-lowfat version, which is nirvana in a tub.

Shitstorm revisited

Update on the sky falling:

Truck no biggie.

Housejacking went off without a problem. Had to go down 33 feet to find solid ground. Very exciting to come home to no front steps and a 5-foot moat across the entire front of the house.

Door replacement by Lowes was really good with a few minor kinks. Apparently people still really like brass hardware. I only had 2 storm doors to choose from because I wanted nickel. The installer comes, tears out the entire frame puts it all back together, very snugly. Looks tight with our newly-level entrance. He had to stop by to install a part that was not working as expected. A few days before he was due back, I looked up and noticed that they had installed brass hinges with the nickel door hardware. What? You've got to be kidding me. Kinda thought that would be understood and I was never consulted about hinges. To Lowes' credit, they said they'd send him with the correct ones and fix us right up. He showed up to compete and they were the wrong size, although the correct non-ugly color. We got a call from our salesperson that he would be stopping by to change the hinges. Guess they figured they guy who made the initial mistake would fix it. I was really impressed with the whole project and will definitely use them again. Plus there is the added bonus that I now have a "Project Card". And Mr S doesn't.

Thanks for the notice

Our holidays began with Father asking me if I would mind hosting Christmas. 2 days before. Of course I didn't have to go to any trouble. Fine. Burgers and chips it is!! Just kidding, turkey and the standard squishy food. MMM I could go for some stuffing right about now. Us, Dad and Grandma, with the added bonus that G-Ma always stays over so I get some good quality time with a fabulous Octogenarian. Everything turned out tasty and perfectly timed, so life was good. G-Ma also helps with dishes so that was covered too. They left to visit, Mr S went to work and I hit the couch with pjs and some Just Pies pumpkin pie, the best in all the land.

Urban Actively Pissing Me Off

Decided that the gym at work was too puny so I started looking at local fancy gyms. Urban Active is brand-new, the location is decent and they have a corporate discount so low $$.

Stopped in the preview center for one that hadn't opened yet and got the spiel. The girl wasn't making an immediate sale, so the guy came over like "I'm the musclebutt manager and she's just a girl". I wonder if they know how off-putting that is? I left with only a list of non-corporate prices and a tour of the ...picture of the gym. By the time I got home, the girl had called and said they did have a corporate membership. Could I come back in that night? Sorry, in general my home has a one-way door on weeknights. Once I'm home, I'm home.

Found out that the Gahanna location was already open and the corp membership was for all gyms so I could start up right away. Mr S and I went and told the saleguy that we just wanted a tour and we could skip the sales pitch. For once, they listened. A thing most gyms do is a "fitness assessment". Translation: sales pitch for personal trainers, of which they have an army. I meet this guy named Napoleon, um Terry. He sits me down, tells me how fat I am, asks me questions designed not to get info, but to humiliate me into paying for personal training sessions. He asked me what I hoped to gain from the session and I said I wanted him to show me how to use some of the machines safely. He said. And I quote: "You don't want to use the machines. You sit all day". I told him that I did indeed want to use the machines. He could show me 600 f&$king ball exercises and I wouldn't do one of them on my own. So then he proceeded to walk me through a workout made up entirely of ball exercises. A lovely bonus service was twice while he was "helping me up", he grunted as if under extreme stress from the sheer immensity of me. Totally out of proportion and after the 2nd time, I'm sure it was again intentional to shame me into a personal trainer. I then had to sit through him hard-selling me in to training, covering the spectrum of again ridiculing the magnitude of my girth to criticizing my income since I said I didn't want to pay. I did not purchase and the first thing I said to Mr S as we walked out the door was "I f%*king hate that guy!"

The following day, I called and asked to speak with the manager, with whom I had spoken at an NCH health fair. I told him about my experience. I was even nice. He said to come in the next morning and there was a person who could show me what I needed. That evening I got a call from Terry who said, while they do not train for free, he'd be happy to show me the machines. I said I'd prefer to work with someone else. he said he'd be happy to show me. I again said I'd prefer to work with somebody else. He asked why and I said I didn't feel particularly comfortable with him so I'd prefer to work with somebody else. He said we got along great. He'd be happy to work with me. 2 more times around this loop and he hung up saying "Fine. Come in at 6 tomorrow and you will work with somebody else!!!"  For the life of me I can't figure out why I was so nice to such an asshat. The next evening I got a call from the "manager" of the trainers. He said to call him because "His people don't train for free." So called the manager manager and explained that I was just going to let it drop because at this point I was really soured on the whole gym thing. He said "I don't know why it is such a big deal. It is such a simple request. I'll be here in the morning whenever you want and I'll train you myself". I showed up the next morning and he showed me exactly what I needed in 30 minutes, was very friendly and that was that. I think he missed training. He was really good at it. He saved a membership and I love the gym, as long as the only person I have to talk to is that nice Allen up front. And I'm getting some serious butt muscles and can find my waist again.

Reassessment

I have a huge amount of catching up to do but I wanted to throw this in before I forget.
I am rethinking the utility of Facebook and Twitter. My initial reaction was "Why do I care?"
But more and more I am beginning to realize that it is an even easier, more relaxed means of keeping up than email and I hate phones. It is passive. You just post what you want, read when you want and comment when you want. Another angle I hadn't considered is the "tracking down old (boy)friends" dimension. I am very content with my life and don't feel the need to add drama, but I am intrigued by this new networking.

Pros:
Satisfy curiosity
Satisfy curiosity
Satisfy curiosity

Cons:
Can't lurk on Facebook. Have to be accepted.
What if I am not accepted?
As I used to be psycho and was raised by wolves, do I really want to open any cans of worms?

Do I click the button?